INFJs, Part Two

Today’s post is part two of my post on INFJs. The first post can be found here. Let’s get right into it, shall we?

“Because the INFJ has such strong intuitive capabilities, they trust their own instincts above all else. This may result in an INFJ’s stubbornness and tendency to ignore other people’s opinions. They believe that they’re right. On the other hand, INFJ is a perfectionist who doubts that they are living up to their full potential. INFJs are rarely at complete peace with themselves – there’s always something else they should be doing to improve themselves and the world around them. They believe in constant growth, and don’t often take time to revel in their accomplishments. They have strong value systems, and need to live their lives in accordance with what they feel is right. In deference to the Feeling aspect of their personalities, INFJs are in some ways gentle and easy going. Conversely, they have very high expectations of themselves, and frequently of their families. They don’t believe in compromising their ideals.”

I believe that in my previous post I spent some time talking about instinct/intuition. Do I trust my instincts more than anything else? At times, yes. However, due to my slight obsession with perfectionism in certain aspects, I don’t place my intuition above everything. Because I’m never truly satisfied with anything I’ve done, I am open to receiving criticism because I have a head knowledge that it is good for me; however, I often find it difficult to actually follow through with all the advice that I’ve been given, not necessarily because of stubbornness, but because of a sense of reluctance in changing what’s already been done.
Therefore, whenever I finally accomplish a goal, I’m not the type to go around and feel good for a long period of time. Due to my cynical/existentialist nature, I remind myself that whatever I’ve done has been done by countless others, and that I now have something else that needs to be done or improved on. There is no time to bask in the sense of victory. There is only time for improvement.

Now, am I gentle and easy-going? I would say yes, because I loathe conflict and I don’t find myself willing to open up, which means that I end up keeping most people emotionally at a distance. Instead of spending time around people, I find myself trying to get better in one such thing or another, because I believe that that is what must be done.

“INFJ is a natural nurturer; patient, devoted and protective. They make loving parents and usually have strong bonds with their offspring. They have high expectations of their children, and push them to be the best that they can be. This can sometimes manifest itself in the INFJ being hard-nosed and stubborn. But generally, children of an INFJ get devoted and sincere parental guidance, combined with deep caring.”

Considering my lack of offspring, I shall merely say that as for children, we can get along quite marvelously. I enjoy spending time with little children, and, for the most part, they do as well. I am not, however, a Mother Theresa who has an infinite fountain of patience, but neither am I the type to start yelling, even when they’re trying to rip my clothes to shreds and throw pillows at me. Which happens more frequently than you might think, to be honest.

“In the workplace, the INFJ usually shows up in areas where they can be creative and somewhat independent. They have a natural affinity for art, and many excel in the sciences, where they make use of their intuition. INFJs can also be found in service-oriented professions. They are not good at dealing with minutia or very detailed tasks. The INFJ will either avoid such things, or else go to the other extreme and become enveloped in the details to the extent that they can no longer see the big picture. An INFJ who has gone the route of becoming meticulous about details may be highly critical of other individuals who are not.”</blockquote

I find the accuracy of this paragraph to be slightly uncanny. It is true, I prefer a degree of independence when doing something. I don’t wish to be utterly secluded, but I’d rather work alone for a good part of whatever I must do; and yes, I’d rather be creative if it can be helped. I appreciate art more than the sciences, and I also do enjoy being of help towards other.

Detailed tasks. If I get told, “Such and such must be done exactly like this, with no room for possible change,” and such detail, I tend to panic. My mind goes into overdrive, something similar to that of the butterfly effect: I think of all the different possibilities if there is but one change, and it doesn’t usually end well. But, as said, there are times I’ll get completely involved in something and obsess and nitpick over every last thing until it works out completely, because I feel as though it has to be done. Then, if just one thing is out of place, I tend to obsess, no doubt due to my semi-frequent perfectionism.

And that, good people, was a brief bit of insight into some of what makes me, me. Now, am I of the belief that any certain personality type can only be good friends with those of the same type? No. I’ve seen people who have freaked out over the fact that their partner was a different personality type than they, and that this website said that that type wasn’t as compatible with the other type as possible. I find it to be ridiculous. People cannot simply have four letters used to define who they are; while they may exhibit many of the traits that fit their type, each person is slightly different in their own unique way. That said, another person of the same personality type may indeed be the one who understands their friend the best. I, for example, find it easier to talk about many things with two people who are both INFJs, and we indeed share much in common; but in many respects, we are vastly different.

I suppose what I could have said much more pithily is the following: we were each made to be the person we were made to be. We can analyze and label and define all we want, but at the end of the day, the fact is that you are you, and I am me.

And I guess that if I’m being honest, I really wouldn’t have it any other way.

Less than three,
Josh

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